The Last Birthday That's Any

Yes, We Praise Women Over 40 For A Multitude Of Reasons. Unfortunately, It's Not Reciprocal. For Every Stunning, Smart, Well-coiffed, Hot Woman Over 40, There Is A Bald, Paunchy Relic In Yellow Pants Making A Fool Of Himself With Some 22-year Old Waitress. Ladies, I Apologize. For All Those Men Who Say, "why Buy The Cow When You Can Get The Milk For Free?", Here's An Update For You. Nowadays 80% Of Women Are Against Marriage. Why? Because Women Realize It's Not Worth Buying An Entire Pig Just To Get A Little Sausage!

Making Duplicate Copies And Computer Printouts Of Things No One Wanted Even One Of In The First Place Is Giving America A New Sense Of Purpose.

I've Done A Lot Of Complaining Here, But Of All The Things I've Complained About, I Can't Complain About My Life.

Obscenities... I Think A Lot Of Dumb People Do It Because They Can't Think Of What They Want To Say And They're Frustrated. A Lot Of Smart People Do It To Pretend They Aren't Very Smart - Want To Be Just One Of The Boys.

You Really Can't Blame The Military For Wanting To Go To War [in Iraq]. They've Got All These New Toys And They Want To Know Whether They Work Or Not.