That's Not To Say That

The Whole Idea Of Celebrity Is Flattering - It Helps You Get Into Restaurants And Stuff - But Once You Obtain Some Creative Fulfillment, Which You Do On A Nightly Basis As A Comedian, It's Hard To Give That Up Just To Be The Wacky Neighbor On A Show.

If Only Opening A Vitamin Water Could Be Classified As Working Out.

I'd Really Like To Promote My Increasing Consumption Of Bacon.

It's Like In Most Parts Of America, Where There Was Industry And There Is No Longer; There Is Cynicism Mixed With Sarcasm And Some Optimism. That's How My Background Influenced My Comedy.

Ironically, To My Children, Bedtime Is A Punishment That Violates Their Basic Rights As Human Beings.