Sometimes My Dad Even Gets

People Are Bringing Shotguns To Ufo Sightings In Fife, Alabama. I Asked A Guy, "why Do You Bring A Gun To A Ufo Sighting?" Guy Said, "way-ul, We Didn' Wanna Be Ab-duc-ted." If I Lived In Fife, Alabama, I Would Be On My Hands And Knees Every Night Praying For Abduction.

I Believe That The Bible Is The Literal Word Of God. And I Say No, It's Not, Dad. Well, I Believe That It Is. Well, You Know, Some People Believe They're Napoleon. That's Fine. Beliefs Are Neat. Cherish Them, But Don't Share Them Like They're The Truth.

...love Rather Than Fear...this Radical Philosophy Is Coming From Me, An Avowed Misanthrope...surely There Is Hope For Us All.

Your Denial Is Beneath You, And Thanks To The Use Of Hallucinogenic Drugs, I See Through You.

I Was A Weekend Drinker...i'd Start On Saturday, End On Friday...thought I Was Controlling It...but I Don't Drink Any More.