Sex Is Great, But When

In The Old Days, That Was My Ad-lib For Hecklers In The Joints I Worked. It Stuck With Me. I Hardly Say It Now, Say, To Fans, Even Though People Do Send Me Hockey Pucks.

When I Got Out Of High School, I Wanted To Be An Actor But Was Getting A Lot Of Rejections. I Was Getting Rejected By Life. My Mother, God Rest Her Soul, Told Me Not To Quit.

Some People Call Me A Legend And The Last Of The Greats, And I Appreciate It.

Eddie Fisher Married To Elizabeth Taylor Is Like Me Trying To Wash The Empire State Building With A Bar Of Soap.

My Whole Act Is Off The Top Of My Head.