Remember, Guns Don't Kill People

Women Cannot Complain About Men Anymore Until They Start Getting Better Taste In Them.

The President Boasted At The Top Of His Press Conference That We Have The Support Now Of Britain And Spain For Our Attack On Iraq. You Know, When You Want To Make It Perfectly Clear To The World That You're Not An Imperialist, The People You Want In Your Corner Are Britain And Spain.

You Know, If You're An American And You're Born At This Time In History Especially, You're Lucky. We All Are. We Won The World History Powerball Lottery...

The House Okayed The Gasoline Tax Cut, Which Will Increase The Deficit, Line The Pockets Of The Oil Companies, And Hurt The Environment; Dole Said That If There Was Just Some Way This Could Interfere With People's Sex Lives, It Would Be Perfect Legislation.

Did You See Britney Spears At The Video Music Awards? I Don't Want To Say That That Performance Was A Disaster, But After The Show, I Saw Rudy Giuliani Having His Picture Taken Standing On Her.