People Expect Too Much Of

I Occasionally Swank A Little Because People Like It; A Modest Man Is Such A Nuisance.

There Is No Subject On Which More Dangerous Nonsense Is Talked And Thought Than Marriage.

To Withhold Deserved Praise Lest It Should Make Its Object Conceited Is As Dishonest As To Withhold Payment Of A Just Debt Lest Your Creditor Should Spend The Money Badly.

Perhaps I Had Better Inform My Protestant Readers That The Famous Dogma Of Papal Infallibility Is By Far The Most Modest Pretension Of The Kind In Existence. Compared With Our Infallible Democracies, Our Infallible Medical Councils, Our Infallible Astronomers, Our Infallible Judges, And Our Infallible Parliaments, The Pope Is On His Knees In The Dust Confessing His Ignorance Before The Throne Of God, Asking Only That As To Certain Historical Matters On Which He Has Clearly More Sources Of Information Open To Him Than Anyone Else His Decision Shall Be Taken As Final.

Man's Inhumanity To Man Is Only Surpassed By His Cruelty To Animals