Oh I Love Children, But

I've Always Tried To Learn From The Greats: Orson Welles, Humphrey Bogart, Ghandi, Buddha, Jesus... It's Just That There's This Tremendous Pressure To Correct All The Things They Got Wrong.

I Mean, I'm A Writer, Actor, And Director. Not To Rock The Boat Or Anything, But Compare That To A Carpenter And, In The End, Who Is The Better Man?

I'm Not Saying Eating Babies Should Be Legal, But When They're So Delicious, What's The Harm In It? I Don't Know What Tastes Better, Their Innocence Or Their Gooey Rib Butter.

I Mean, Personally, I Would Have Had No Problem Surviving. Come On, How Hard Is It To Swim?

I've Turned Down A Lot Of Proposed Scripts For Scrubs Episodes, Mainly Ones With Aids Patients. It Sickens Me, Really. If You Don't Want Aids, Don't Be A Ice Cream Man. Or African. I'm Neither And I'm Fine.