Labour Day Is A Great

Did You Hear About This Genius That Got On A Plane And Set Fire To His Feet? Turns Out He Had Bombs In His Shoes And The Problem All Started When The Flight Attendants Asked Him Nicely To Extinguish His Feet. He Was Wearing Exploding Sneakers. The New Nike Air-jihads!

The 4th Of July Combines The Two Things Americans Love Most In One Day: Alcohol And Explosives.

Senate Minority Leader Harry Reid Says He Will Not Seek Re-election. Harry Said He Wants To Spend More Time With His Family. As I Always Say, Check With Your Family.

I Heard Doctors Revived A Man Who Had Been Dead For 4-1/2 Minutes. When They Asked Him What It Was Like Being Dead, He Said It Was Like Listening To Yankees Announcer Phil Rizzuto During A Rain Delay.

Newt Gingrich Says He Wants To Get Rid Of Social Security. Who Is More Qualified To Give This Country Financial Advice Than A Guy Who Ran Up A Half-million Dollar Bill At Tiffany?