Man, You're No Smarter Than

Dreams Should Be Forgotten When We Wake. Or One Day We Will Find Ourselves Unable To Sleep.

We Did Make Use, From Time To Time, Of Candles, Neckties, Scarves, Shoelaces, A Little Water-color Paintbrush, Her Hairbrush, Butter, Whipped Cream, Strawberry Jam, Johnson’s Baby Oil, My Swedish Hand Vibrator, A Fascinating Bead Necklace She Had, Miscellaneous Common Household Items, And Every Molecule Of Flesh That Was Exposed To Air Or Could Be Located With Strenuous Search.

Librarians Are Like Crack Dealers When It Comes To Hooking Small Children.

You Become Uneasy With People In Direct Proportion To How Many Lies You Have To Keep Track Of In Their Presence.

If A Person Who Indulges In Gluttony Is A Glutton, And A Person Who Commits A Felony Is A Felon, Then God Is An Iron.