Lot Of Ugly Funny Dudes

The Truly Great Actors, Like Charlize Theron, Are Just Like, "i'm An Actor. For Hire. I Show Up, I Do My Job." There's No "i'm Just Waiting For The Inspiration." They Just Do Their Jobs. They Say, "let's Go Over The Scene A Few Times And Get It."

The Kentucky Fried Chicken Corporation Made A Bobble Head Of Me And Sent It To My Management. No Card, Nothing.

Before Doing My First Open Mic, I Was Sitting In The Back Watching All These Comedians Banter Back And Forth And Fire Jokes And Up Each Other, And I Thought, This Is Where I Wanna Be.

I've Hung Out In The Writer's Room A Few Times, But The Fact Is We've Got Such A Good Writing Staff, I Don't Want To Get My Peanut Butter Fingerprints On Anything.

This Sounds Like A Brag, But I Know How To Make Good Fried Rice. I Learned In College. There Are Two Secrets - Take The Rice After You Cook It And Let It Get Cold In The Fridge. Then Cook The Egg Like You're Making A Fried Egg And Just Before It's Done, Dump The Rice And Veg On It And Swirl It Around.