I've Gotten In Trouble With

It's A Great Day In America When White People, Black People And Latinos Can All Come Together And Pick On Another Minority.

It's An Honor To Walk In The Footsteps Of A Legend. As Host I Intend To Honor The Tradition Of The Bob Hope Classic And Have A Great Time Blazing A New Path.

Life Is Moments Going By, But If You Don't Grab Them, They're Gone. For A Long Time, The Only Moments That Were Available Were Bad Ones. So Now I Make Sure To Grab The Good Ones.

I Think It's Easier For African American And White Comics To Be Praised Than It Is Latinos Because They Think Our Culture Or Our Humor Is Substandard. I Mean, I Just Don't Think They Want To Give Us Credit. I Just Don't Think That They See Us As Important Enough To Be At Their Level. I'm The Longest-produced Comedy At Warner Bros. And I Don't Feel Special. They Come Over And Say Hello. But Everybody's Gonna Make A Lot Of Money And I Don't Feel Like I'm Special To Them.

[there's] A Joke That I've Done Forever: 'nowadays They Say That The Largest Majority Of People Will Be Latino And You'll Tell Scary Stories To Your Grandkids: "a Long Time Ago When I Was Growing Up, There Used To Be People Who Were White," And The Kid Says, "really?" And You Say, "yeah, Like The Man Who Cuts Our Grass."' I've Had That Line Forever And I Love It.