It Couldn't Pull A Greased

The Problem Is That Television Executives Have Got It Into Their Heads That If One Presenter On A Show Is A Blonde-haired, Blue-eyed Heterosexual Boy, The Other Must Be A Black Muslim Lesbian.

I Think It's A Good Idea To Tie Peter Mandelson To A Van. Such An Act Would Be Cruel And Barbaric And Inhuman. But It Would At Least Cheer Everyone Up A Bit.

This Is The Renault Espace, Probably The Best Of The People Carriers. Not That That's Much To Shout About. That's Like Saying “ooh Good I've Got Syphilis, The Best Of The Sexually Transmitted Diseases.”

The Air Conditioning In Lamborghinis Used To Be An Asthmatic Sitting In The Dashboard Blowing At You Through A Straw.

If You're Thinking Of Coming To America, This Is What It's Like: You've Got Your Comfort Inn, You've Got Your Best Western, And You've Got Your Red Lobster Where You Eat. Everybody's Very Fat, Everybody's Very Stupid And Everybody's Very Rude - It's Not A Holiday Programme, It's The Truth.