I'm Not A Clotheshorse Or

I Was Just Another Long-haired Teenage Kid With Visions Of Grandeur, Strumming A Tennis Racket Or A Broom In Front Of His Bedroom Mirror.

I Try To Explain That To My Kids - The Experience Of Going To A Record Store, Flipping Through Racks And Finding That Album Cover That Intrigues You - But My Kids Don't Want To Know About It. They Download The One Song On The Album They Like, And Pay Their 99 Cents.

This Is The Way I Look At Sex Scenes: I Have Basically Been Doing Them For A Living For Years. Trying To Seduce An Audience Is The Basis Of Rock 'n Roll, And If I May Say So, I'm Pretty Good At It...plus, Being Married And Monogamous, It's The Closest Thing I Can Do To Having Sex Without Getting In Trouble For It...the Only Thing I Like More Than My Wife Is My Money, And I'm Not About To Lose That To Her And Her Lawyers, That's For Damn Sure.

Miracles Happen Everyday, Change Your Perception Of What A Miracle Is And You'll See Them All Around You.

I Believe That We're Only As Strong As Our Neighbor Is, And The Idea That, I'm My Brother's Keeper Works For Me.