I'll Make Fun Of Anybody.

The Shamrock Is A Religious Symbol. St. Patrick Said The Leaves Represented The Trinity: The Father, The Son And The Holy Spirit. That's Why Four Leaf Clovers Are So Lucky, You Get A Bonus Jesus.

No Matter How You Were Born, No Matter How You Identify, I Want To Be Clear That I Would Be Proud To Grind You Up And Eat You.

If Someone Does Offer You A Job, Say 'yes.' You Can Always Quit Later. Then At Least You'll Be One Of The Unemployed As Opposed To One Of The Never-employed. Nothing Looks Worse On A Resume Than Nothing.

If You Think You Can Lead Your Flock Of Sheeple And Peeps To Some Glorified Noodle Fest On The Mall, You Got Another Thing Coming, Mister.

I Wrote Things For The School's Newspaper, And - Like All Teenagers - I Dabbled In Poetry.