If You Covered A Broom

You Know, Just Sometimes, In Between The First Cigarette With Coffee In The Morning To That Four Hundredth Glass Of Cornershop Piss At 3am, You Do Sometimes Look At Yourself And Think...this Is Fantastic. I'm In Heaven.

I Think You Should, Yeah. You Should Wash Your Beard, Then Shave It Off, Nail It To A Frisbee And Fling It Over A Rainbow.

I've Been Writing Since I Was Very Young, Even Before I Was A Teenager. As Far As I'm Concerned, I Am A Writer - Whether My Writing's Spoken Or Written In A Blog, Paper, Book Or Printed On The Side Of A Submarine.

There's Always A Host Of Voices You're Inspired By. I Love Don Delillo, And I Love Isaac Bashevis Singer, And I Love Beckett, And I Love Pinter. He's One Of The Funniest Voices In English Literature Since Dickens.

I'm Actually About As Famous As A Fourth Division Footballer From The 70s.