If I Was A Lawyer,

I Had This Bad-boy-from-new York Vibe Going, Dressed Like A Punk Rocker With Spiky Hair.

Tofu Is The Root Of All Evil, And There's Only One Thing That Can Change A Man's Mind, And That's A Modified Uzi With An Extra-long Clip.

I've Always Felt That If You're Not On Your Side, Why Should Anyone Else Be. So I Always Encourage People To Be Confident, And Sometime Even A Little Falsely So, Just So You Can Give Yourself An Opportunity.

At The End Of The Day, Anything I Think I'm Sacrificing I'm Just Giving Up Because It Makes Me Feel Better.

I Saw School Of Rock, And I Was Like, Why Haven't I Worked With Richard Linklater Already? Then By The Time I Got Him I Was Like, I'm Really Pissed Off I Feel Like You Owe Me Some Retroactive Swag. He Gave Me The 10-year Anniversary "dazed And Confused" T-shirt, Which I Still Wear With Relish.