If A Man Watches Three

It Is Ludicrous To Read The Microwave Direction On The Boxes Of Food You Buy, As Each One Will Have A Disclaimer: This Will Vary With Your Microwave. Loosely Translated, This Means, You're On Your Own, Bernice.

Those Magazine Dieting Stories Always Have The Testimonial Of A Woman Who Wore A Dress That Could Slipcover New Jersey In One Photo And Thirty Days Later Looked Like A Well-dressed Thermometer.

Guilt: The Gift That Keeps On Giving.

Being A Child At Home Alone In The Summer Is A High-risk Occupation. If You Call Your Mother At Work Thirteen Times An Hour, She Can Hurt You.

Adults Can Take A Simple Holiday For Children And Screw It Up. What Began As A Presentation Of Simple Gifts To Delight And Surprise Children Around The Christmas Tree Has Culminated In A Woman Unwrapping Six Shrimp Forks From Her Dog, Who Drew Her Name.