I Work With A Lot

You Know You're Lazy When You Run Out Of Toilet Paper And Use The Cardboard Roll To Wipe With.

Listening To Evanescence Makes Me Want To Break Up With A Girl In Real Time As A Giant Antique Hourglass Falls To The Floor In Slow Motion.

You Must Accept Responsibility For Your Actions. This Doesn't Include Reactions, Interactions Or Transactions If You're Thinkin' Loophole.

Any Guy That Refers To Dating Women As The Hunt Or Being On The Prowl Should Be Evaluated For A Number Of Conditions.

When You're On A Movie Set And You Are Hopefully Making A Comedy, Everyone's Stifling Their Laughter. You're Looking At The Crew Guys, Hoping Someone Is Making That Face Like, And Not Like, This Is Not Working Out, Man.