I Wish I Could Relate

It's Not My Dreams That Get Me In Trouble, It's What My Wife Dreams I Did. My Wife Punched Me In The Middle Of The Night; I Woke Up And Went Oww! What Was That For?, And She Goes I Dreamt You Were Making Out With Faith Hill. I Said I Wasn't Dreaming Anything! Send Her Over To My Dreams, And We'll Both Be Happy.

You Might Be A Redneck If You're A Lite Beer Drinker, Because You Start Drinking When It Gets Light.

My Whole Career Can Be Summed Up With 'ignorance Is Bliss.' When You Do Not Know Better, You Do Not Really Worry About Failing.

Being A Comedian, People Tell Me Stuff They Shouldn't Tell Their Therapist.

If Men Have A Smell It's Usually An Accident.