I Went Skiing Today, Too,

Have You Seen That Magazine Barely Legal? That Means When You Look At It, You're Almost A Pedophile.

I Smoke So Much. Three Packs A Day... I Went To The Bathroom, A Camel Came Out Of My Ass.

So I Took Her Back To My Place And We Did It Doggy Style, Not Because We Planned It That Way, But That's Just How She Passed Out.

I Have No Grand Scheme.

I'm Not The Comic Of The Generation, I'm Not Even The Funniest Guy In My Family.