I Was Brought Up As

I'm Not Going To Throw Away The Hand Of Friendship To Suit 100 Trotskyites In Glasgow.

Life Is Supposed To Be Fun. It's Not A Job Or Occupation. We're Here Only Once And We Should Have A Bit Of A Laugh.

Paddy Was In The Delivery Room When The Midwife Handed Him A Black Baby. "is This Yours?" She Asked "probably" Said Paddy "she Burns Everything Else"

I Think Comedy Is Difficult, And I'm Amazed So Many People Want To Do It. I'll Be Buying Jeans And Somebody Will Say, "i'm A Comedian" - The Guy Selling You The Jeans. The Desire To Be A Comedian Is Weird. I Found It Weird Myself To Want To Be One; I Was A Schoolboy When I Wanted To Be One But I Didn't Know How To Do It. That Was 50 Years Ago, So Times Have Changed Greatly. There Seems To Be A Long Line Of People Desperate To Do It And Most Of Them Are Quite Good.

So, Have You Heard About The Oyster Who Went To A Disco And Pulled A Mussel?