I Think The News People

I Never, Ever In My Life Tried To Be Outrageous. I've Only Ever Tried To Say What Was Truly On My Mind And Not Pull Punches About It.

Tea Party Has Now Cost The Republicans 5 Senate Seats. My Next Donation Is Going To Them.

Newt Gingrich Was Campaigning At A Zoo This Week And He Was Bitten By A Penguin. Newt Gingrich Is Always Campaigning At Zoos. Mitt Romney Once Did A Photo Op At A Zoo. That Was A Big Mistake, Because He Stood Next To The Chameleon, And He Changed Colors.

If Nobody Is Clear On What You're Protesting, It's Not A Protest. Thousands Of People Gathered In London This Week To Voice Their Disapproval Of The G-20. Their Basic Message Being, Stop All Your Globalizing And Unite The World!

As A Comedian, I Think We All Look For Those Areas Where The Truth Diverts From What People Are Saying. That's Why Politics Is Such A Rich Area For Us, Because Politicians Make Promises, And They Don't Keep Them, And When We Point Out The Difference, We Get The Laugh.