I Suggest Due Process, Speedy

Forget 'redeeming Social Value,' Dirty Pictures Are Fun. When I Die I Want My Ashes Sprinkled Over A Nudist Camp.

The Function Of Government Is To Provide You With Service; The Function Of The Media Is To Supply The Vaseline.

I Propose A Constitutional Amendment Providing That, If Any Public Official, Elected Or Appointed, At Any Level Of Government, Is Caught Lying To Any Member Of The Public For Any Reason, The Punishment Shall Be Death By Public Hanging.

Incidentally, The Next Time Some War-mongering Wise-ass Tries To Tell You That One Reason We're In The Middle East Is To Enhance The Civil Rights And Social Equality Of Women, Remind Them That We Very Enthusiastically Destroyed The Most Secular Country Over There, Where Women Could Dress As They Liked, Have Good Jobs, Be Literate, And Vote.

Reread That Pesky First Clause Of The Second Amendment. It Doesn't Say What Any Of Us Thought It Said. What It Says Is That Infringing The Right Of The People To Keep And Bears Arms Is Treason. What Else Do You Call An Act That Endangers "the Security Of A Free State"? And If It's Treason,then It's Punishable By Death. I Suggest Due Process, Speedy Trials, And Public Hangings.