I Saw A Large, Red

My Mother Did All She Could To Control Me, But At Age 14 She Sent Me To A Military School.

If You Sent Me To Cover A Pie-baking Contest On Mother's Day, I'm Going To Ask Dear Old Mom Why She Used Artificial Sweetener Or Stole The Apples!

My Mother Gave Me A Push. If I Hadn't Had Her, Maybe I Wouldn't Have Had The Push. If I Hadn't Gone To Military School, Maybe I Wouldn't Have Decided To Get With The Program. Maybe I'd Be Running A Bulldozer, Rather Than Going On And Doing Something More.

Call Me A Braggart, Call Me Arrogant. People At Abc (and Elsewhere) Have Called Me Worse. But When You Need The Job Done On Deadline, You'll Call Me.

Well, I Was Born In El Paso, Texas, It Was In The Nearest Hospital To The Family Farm.