I Sang In The Choir

I Can't Even Get Three Weeks Off To Have Cosmetic Surgery.

When I Said I Didn't Have A Cent, I Didn't. I Used To Get Annoyed With People Who Said They Were Broke When They Had Five Dollars.

My Table Seats Eight, So That's My Maximum. Having A Small Number Of Guests Is The Only Way To Generate Good Conversation. Besides, Your Whole House Doesn't Get Wrecked That Way.

I'm Liberace Without A Piano.

Women Are My Best Friends, My Best Audience. If I Look Out From The Stage And See A Lot Of Men, I Know I'm In Trouble