I Once Went Out With

I Get No Respect... I Tell You, When I Was Born, The Doctor Smacked My Mother

I Don't Know Kid, There Are So Many Places They Could Hide.

One Day As I Came Home Early, I Saw A Man Jogging Naked. I Said To The Guy, 'hey, Buddy, Why Are You Doing That?' He Said, 'because You Came Home Early.'

My Sex Life Is Terrible; My Wife Put A Mirror Over The Dog's Bed. Actually She Did Put A Mirror Over Our Bed. She Says She Likes To Watch Herself Laugh.

It's Lonely On The Top When There's No One On The Bottom.