I Once Gave A Girl

I'm Obsessed With Coffee. My Doctor Says If I Don't Cut Back, I Am Going To Permanently Damage My Esophagus. No Joke.

I've Taken Magic Lessons Since I Was Five-years-old. When I Was Little I Would Wear A Top Hat And Cape, And I'd Get Relentlessly Beat Up By Jocks. That's Why I Don't Care For Sports.

My Dream Is To Make The World's Scariest Pg Movie. Because I Feel That If You Can Do That, Then You've Done Something Special.

Cargo Pants Freak Me Out. Too Many Pockets. I Always Forget Where My Wallet Is.

I Looked Like A 'super Mario Bros.' Goomba. It's Arguably The Ugliest Haircut On The Planet.