I'm A Comedian, Not A

I Guess My Feeling Is That If You’re Going To Make A Joke, That’s Fine, But You Should Also Sort Of Stand Behind It, You Know? A Joke Should Be More Than A Joke, It Should Be A Point That You’re Trying To Make.

Honestly, I've Always Had Difficulty Relaxing, Unwinding And Going To Bed - That Kind Of Stuff.

Rich People Don't Pay Taxes? Of Course They Pay Taxes - They Pay Tons In Taxes. They Pay For Everyone Else Who Doesn't Pay Taxes.

If The Media Isnt Slanted Toward The Left, Why Is Everyone So Worried About My Affiliation With Glenn Beck But Not With Alec Baldwin?

That's An Interesting Philosophical Question. When Your Boner Goes Away, Is That One Gone... Forever?