I Like The Second Better,

Lately I’d Begun Carrying Pain Amulets In My Bag, Like Some People Have Breath Mints.

But A Slow, Deeply Satisfied Smile Came Over Him, And His Breath Quickened. 'so Softly It Starts,' He Whispered. 'foolishly Clever And With An Unsurvivable Trust. It Just Saved Your Miserable Life, That Questionable Show Of Thought, My Itchy-witch.' Al’s Smile Shifted, Becoming Lighter. 'and Now You Will Live To Possibly Regret It.

Sure, He Had A Wife And Fifty-four Kids, But He Looked Like A College Freshman. A Yummy College Freshman Majoring In Oh-my-god-i-gotta-get-me-some-of-that.

I Sighed. I Hated The Maze Of Bureaucracy With A Passion, But I've Found The Best Way To Deal With It Is To Smile And Act Stupid. That Way, No One Gets Confused.

Al Was Looking At Me In Disbelief. “not Your Lover?” “no.” “but He Is Rachel Candy,” Al Said, His Confusion Too Honest To Be Faked.