I Know I'm Not A

Being A Leading Man... That's Like Saying I Want To Be Astronaut. That's Not Going To Happen.

I Don't Text, I Don't Have A Blackberry. Literally, I Just Have A Cell Phone That I Haven't Programmed And The Whole Bluetooth. No. I Don't Even Have An Earpiece For My Cell Phone.

I Ate Fiberglass Insulation. It Wasn’t Cotton Candy Like The Guy Said… My Tummy Itches.

Everybody Should Be Normal. Everybody Should Be Nice. I Think They Go Hand In Hand, And That To Me Is The Default Setting.

I'm A Fun Dad, But I Don't Know If I'm The Fun, Crazy Dad.