I Have Yet To Find

A Man Reserves His True And Deepest Love Not For The Species Of Woman In Whose Company He Finds Himself Electrified And Enkindled, But For That One In Whose Company He May Feel Tenderly Drowsy.

Love Demands Infinitely Less Than Friendship.

I Know Many Married Men, I Even Know A Few Happily Married Men, But I Don't Know One Who Wouldn't Fall Down The First Open Coal Hole Running After The First Pretty Girl Who Gave Him A Wink.

A Ham Is Simply Any Actor Who Has Not Been Successful In Repressing His Natural Instincts.

Whenever A Man Encounters A Woman In A Mood He Doesn't Understand, He Wants To Know If She's Tired.