I Have A Jar At

Every Fight Is A Food Fight When Youre A Cannibal.

Whenever I Try To Spell 'banana,' I Feel Stupid Because I Don't Know When To End It.

It Seems That Man's Greatest Natural Enemy Is The Target.

I Set A Personal Record On Christmas. I Got My Shopping Done Three Weeks Ahead Of Time. I Had All The Presents Back At My Apartment, I Was Halfway Through Wrapping Them, And I Realized, 'damn, I Used The Wrong Wrapping Paper.' The Paper I Used Said, 'happy Birthday.' I Didn't Want To Waste It, So I Just Wrote 'jesus' On It.

Halloween's My Favorite Holiday Because You Don't Have To Spend It With Your Family.