I Find My Movie Props

It Depresses Me When People Expect Me To Be Like The Characters I Play On Film. I'm Not Some Whiny Loser Punk, I'm A Man's Man.

It's A Good Thing I'm A Professional And Could See The Pure Genius Talent Behind The Raw Sexual Beauty.

I Like To Drop In On People Who Picked On Me In High School Or Whatever, Just Out Of The Blue, And Chat With Them To See How They Think Of Me Now That I'm A Big Star. Usually They're A Lot Nicer. After About Half An Hour, I Excuse Myself To Go To The Bathroom, And Leave A Few Dvds Or Pictures There. Then When I Come Out, I Say Good-bye And Leave. Then I Call The Cops.

I Lot Of People Remember When That Kid Spray-painted My Brand New Porsche For Punk'd. That Was Pretty Funny. He Got Me Pretty Good. Of Course, Most People Don't Know I Eventually Got Him Back With My Own Show. I Call It A Show, Really It's Just An Hour-long Video Shot In My Bedroom Featuring The Two Of Us.

I've Never Had Much Sympathy For Orphans, I Mean, When I Was Their Age I Would Have Killed To Have No Parents To Make Me Clean My Room And Stuff