I Feel Acutely Aware Of

I Traded Cowardice For Cruelty; I Traded Weakness For Ferocity.

Just Do What You're Supposed To.

Sometimes Pain Is For The Greater Good.

I Think He Came To Die With Me," I Say. I Clamp My Hand Over My Mouth To Stifle A Sob. If I Can Keep Breathing, I Can Stop Crying. I Didn't Need Or Want Him To Die With Me. I Wanted To Keep Him Safe. What An Idiot, I Think, But My Heart Isn't In It. "that's Ridiculous," He Says. "that Doesn't Make Any Sense. He's Eighteen; He'll Find Another Girlfriend Once You're Dead. And He's Stupid If He Doesn't Know That." Tears Run Down My Cheeks, Hot At First And Then Cold. I Close My Eyes. "if You Think That's What It's About..." I Swallow Another Sob. "...you're The Stupid One.

But Now I Know How Large The World Is... Well. I Suppose I Have Grown To Large Out Of My Faction. As A Consequence.