I Don't Often Agree With

Asking The Front Wheels Of A Car To Do Their Normal Job Of Steering While Handling More Than 170 Is Like Asking A Man To Wire A Plug While Juggling. Penguins. While Making Love. To A Beautiful Woman While On Fire, On Stage. In Front Of The Queen. It's All Going To Go Wrong.

The Air Conditioning In Lamborghinis Used To Be An Asthmatic Sitting In The Dashboard Blowing At You Through A Straw.

Ecologically Speaking, A Spilt Tanker Load Is Like Sticking A Safety Pin Into An Elephant's Foot. The Planet Barely Notices. After The Exxon Valdez Accident In Alaska The Oil Company Spent Billions Tidying Up The Coastline, But It Was A Waste Of Money Because The Waves Were Cleaning Up Faster Than Exxon Could. Environmentalists Can Never Accept The Planet's Ability To Self-heal.

If A Football Official Were To Call For A Slow-motion Replay Every Time Didier Drogba Fell Over, Each Match Would Last About Six Weeks.

Being Smarter Than You Look Is Better Than Looking Smarter Than You Are.