I Dearly Love The State

Although A Life-long Fashion Dropout, I Have Absorbed Enough By Reading Harper's Bazaar While Waiting At The Dentist's To Have Grasped That The Purpose Of Fashion Is To Make A Statement. My Own Modest Statement, Discerned By True Cognoscenti, Is, "woman Who Wears Clothes So She Won't Be Naked.

Imagine Wasting All That Perfectly Good Anger On Paranoid Fantasies. Not Since Emily Litella Got Upset About "soviet Jewelry" Has There Been Such A Waste Of Anger. You Will Notice A Certain Theme To These Emily Litella Moments. Behind Them All Is A Touching Faith That Someone, Somewhere Is Actually In Charge Of What's Happening - A Proposition I Beg Leave To Doubt.

Pigs Get Fat And Hogs Get Slaughtered.

Some Days, I'd Feel Better With Punxsutawney Phil In The Oval Office - At Least He Doesn't Lie About The Weather.

During A Recent Panel On The Numerous Failures Of American Journalism, I Proposed That Almost All Stories About Government Should Begin: “look Out! They're About To Smack You Around Again!