I Can't Understand Why More

But It Was I - Yes I - Who Discovered The Link Between Excessive Masturbation And Entry Into Politics!

There Are Worse Things Than Death. Many Of Them Playing At A Theater Near You.

If God Is Everywhere, I Had Concluded, Then He Is In Food. Therefore, The More I Ate The Godlier I Would Become. Impelled By This New Religious Fervor, I Glutted Myself Like A Fanatic.

My Ex-wife Was A Philosophy Major At Nyu. Yeah, She And I Used To Have Deep Philosophical Discussions Where She Would Prove That I Didn't Exist.

I Took A Speed-reading Course And Read War And Peace In Twenty Minutes. It Involves Russia.