I Can't Like Watching Project

The First Time I See A Jogger Smiling, I'll Consider It.

A Child Can Be Taught Not To Do Certain Things, Such As Touch A Hot Stove, Pull Lamps Off Of Tables, And Wake Mommy Before Noon.

My Breasts Are So Low, Now I Can Have A Mammogram And A Pedicure At The Same Time.

I Think We All In Comedi Business, Especially When We Reach A Certain Age, Are Divas Up To A Point. I Love When A Limousine Comes For Me, I Can't Lie About That. I Love When You Go To A Restaurant And They Say, "come This Way, Miss Rivers," And You Get A Good Table. I Love All That, The Perks That Come With The Business.

The Palestinians Cannot Throw Rockets And Expect People Not To Defend Themselves