I Always Liked The Smell

When He Realized Who He'd Pulled Over, The Policeman Shook His Head In Disbelief. He Told Me Of All People I Should Know Better. He Gave Me A Real Dressing Down, But Let Me Go.

I Respect People And Expect That Kind Of Respect Back.

My Doctor Asked Me If I Smoked, And I Said Only When I'm Working, Golfing, Or Drinking. Then I Realized The Only Time I Don't Smoke Is When I'm Home. I Didn't Even Realize I'd Become A Smoker.

For Lack Of A Better Term, They've Labeled Me A Sex Symbol. It's Flattering And It Should Happen To Every Bald, Overweight Guy.

Coming From Chicago, I Like A White Christmas.