I Ain't No Movie Star,

I Bought My Parents A Home Before They Died, And They Got To See That I Was Going To Be All Right. They Always Thought I Would Go Someplace.

Unfortunately, The Show's Success Comes At The Expense Of Its Biggest Asset -- The Comedians Themselves.

I Won't Talk About What It Was Like In Prison, Except To Say I'm Glad I'm Out And That I Plan Never To Go Back And To Pay My Taxes Every Day.

I Was Kicked Out Of School Because Of My Attitude. I Was Not Assimilating. So I Went To Work, Taking Any Jobs I Could Get.

I Urge You To Ask Yourself Just How Honorable It Is To Preside Over The Abuse And Suffering Of Animals.