Habit Gives Endurance, And Fatigue

Something Settiled Inside Me, Something Heavy And Hard. It Stayed There, And I Could Not Think Of One Thing To Make It Go Away. I Thought, So This Must Be Living, This Must Be The Beginning Of The Time People Later Refer To As 'years Ago, When I Was Young'.

I Had Been A Girl Of Whom Certain Things Were Expected, None Of Them Too Bad: A Career As A Nurse, For Example; A Sense Of Duty To My Parents; Obedience To The Law And Worship Of Convention. But In One Year Of Being Away From Home, That Girl Had Gone Out Of Existence.

I Think Life Is Difficult And That's That. I Am Not At All - Absolutely Not At All - Interested In The Pursuit Of Happiness. I Am Not Interested In The Pursuit Of Positivity. I Am Interested In Pursuing A Truth, And The Truth Often Seems To Be Not Happiness But Its Opposite.

I'm Trying To Earn A Living In The Way That Is Most Enjoyable To Me. I Love The World Of Literature, And I Hope To Support Myself In It.

Why Is A Picture Of Something Real Eventually More Exciting Than The Thing Itself?