Forty Million Americans Smoked Marijuana;

It Looks Like Rudy Giuliani Is Out Of The Race. Finally, A Republican With An Exit Strategy.

The First Lady Said About Her Husband, 'i Could Take Up A Whole Afternoon Talking About His Failures.' And Today She Was Offered Her Own Show On Fox News.

The Ceo Of Enron, Jeffrey Skilling, Married One Of The Enron Secretaries This Week. It's Amazing How Romantic These Enron Guys Can Be When They Realize That Wives Can't Be Forced To Testify Against Their Husbands. Skilling Said Today She Was The Best Secretary Enron Had Ever Had. She Could Shred 950 Words A Minute. ... I Guess They Are On Their Honeymoon Right Now. That's Going Pretty Well. Hey, He's Used To Screwing Enron Employees.

The Ceo Of The Cheesecake Factory Is Now Warning That Obamacare Will Be Very Costly. Hey, The Cheesecake Factory Is One Of The Reasons We Need Obamacare In The First Place.

Enron Is Now Officially Out Of The Energy Business. They Are Now In A New Business: Confetti.