For A While, Some Schools

In Los Angeles On Black Friday, A Woman Pepper Sprayed Wal-mart Shoppers Who Tried To Cut In Line. The Police Acted Fast By Immediately Hiring Her To Get Rid Of Peaceful Protesters Outside Banking Institutions All Across The United States.

Everything Went Smoothly At The Sailing Events Today, Except For The British Team. They Forgot To Bring Limes And They All Got Scurvy.

It Is A Great Day For The Great State Of Texas. The Last Person Being Tested For Ebola Has Come Back Clean. So Texas Is Now Ebola Free. This Was A Big Week For Them. They're Now Free Of Ebola - And Democrats.

The Bible Has Been Through At Least Half A Dozen Translations By The Time You Read It. Plus, When The Word Of God Is Infected By The Hand Of Man, That Is, Written Down, It Is Tainted.

Andy Warhol Said That In The Future Everyone Will Be Famous For 15 Minutes. Facebook Is Exactly Like That Except You're Not Really Famous And Your 15 Minutes Goes On Forever.