Don't Bother Discussing Sex With

When Someone Asks, 'why Do You Think He's Not Calling Me?' There's Always One Answer - 'he's Not Interested.' There's Not Ever Any Other Answer.

If Food Did Not Exist It Would Be Well-nigh Impossible To Get Certain Types Off The Phone, As One Would Be Unable To Say, 'look, I've Got To Run But Let's Have Dinner Sometime Soon.'

All The Time I'm Not Writing I Feel Like A Criminal. It's Horrible To Feel Felonious Every Second Of The Day. It's Much More Relaxing To Actually Write.

If You Can Stay In Love For More Than Two Years, You're On Something.

Even If People Aren't Republicans, It Doesn't Seem Shocking To Them That Ronald Reagan Was The President. Well Of Course, Because Arnold Schwarzenegger Was The Governor! This Is Not Only A Bar Too Low, This Is No Bar At All. I Don't Care Who You Are, You Know 20 People Smarter Than Ronald Reagan. You Know 20 People Who Would Be A Better President Than Ronald Reagan.