Doing Your Best Means Never

An Infallible Remedy For The Tooth-ach, Viz Wash The Root Of An Aching Tooth, In Elder Vinegar, And Let It Dry Half An Hour In The Sun; After Which It Will Never Ach More; Probatum Est.

I Am About Courting A Girl I Have Had But Little Acquaintance With. How Shall I Come To A Knowledge Of Her Faults, And Whether She Has The Virtues I Imagine She Has? Answer. Commend Her Among Her Female Acquaintances.

There Are Many Roads To Success, But Only One Sure Road To Failure; And That Is To Try To Please Everyone Else.

You Can Bear Your Own Faults, And Why Not A Fault In Your Wife?

The Greatest Inventions Are Those Inquiries Which Tend To Increase The Power Of Man Over Matter.