[comedy] Is An Escape From

I'm Not Into Those Kind Of Rivalries. I Remember Standing Out In Front Of Stratford, Minding My Own Business. Carload Of About Eighty Kids Would Pull Up: 'stratford Sucks!' Am I Supposed To Run After These Guys? I'd Just Stand There, You Know. They'd Back Up. 'stratford Sucks! ...stratford Sucks!' I'd Say, 'i Know. I Go There. You're Wasting Gas, Man.

You're Not A Human Till You're In My Phone Book. There. My Hat Is Now In The Political Ring.

As Long As One Person Lives In Darkness Then It Seems To Be A Responsibility To Tell Other People.

People Say To Me, Hey, Bill, The War Made Us Feel Better About Ourselves. Really? What Kind Of People Are These With Such Low Self-esteem That They Need A War To Feel Better About Themselves? May I Suggest, Instead Of A War To Feel Better About Yourself, Perhaps... Sit-ups? Maybe A Fruit Cup? Eight Glasses Of Water A Day?

I've Learned A Lot About Women. I Think I've Learned Exactly How The Fall Of Man Occured In The Garden Of Eden. Adam And Eve Were In The Garden Of Eden, And Adam Said One Day, Wow, Eve, Here We Are, At One With Nature, At One With God, We'll Never Age, We'll Never Die, And All Our Dreams Come True The Instant That We Have Them. And Eve Said, Yeah... It's Just Not Enough Is It?