Comedians Rarely Have Writers, And

I Have More Pictures Of My Children Than My Father Ever Looked At Me.

I Was Watching The Animal Planet. Did You Know That The Male Seahorse Has The Baby? Why Don't They Just Call That One The Female?

The Whole Idea Of Celebrity Is Flattering - It Helps You Get Into Restaurants And Stuff - But Once You Obtain Some Creative Fulfillment, Which You Do On A Nightly Basis As A Comedian, It's Hard To Give That Up Just To Be The Wacky Neighbor On A Show.

I Recently Bought Extreme Chunky Peanut Butter. I Opened It Up.. .it Was Just Peanuts. Wow That Is Extreme!

Some People Have Their Own Bowling Ball And Their Own Bowling Shoes... And No Friends.