Cars And Women Are A

I Get No Respect... I Tell You, When I Was Born, The Doctor Smacked My Mother

My Cousins Gay, He Went To London Only To Find Out That Big Ben Was A Clock.

I Haven't Spoken To My Wife In Years. I Didn't Want To Interrupt Her.

I Come Home From Work Early One Day, And I See A Guy Jogging Down The Street In His Underwear. I Ask Him, "why Are You Jogging In Your Underwear?" He Says, "you Came Home From Work Early".

If You Can't Write Your Own Material, You Have Very Little Chance Of Making It As A Comedian.