As A Live Stand-up Comedy

People Like What They Like. They're Gonna Do What They're Gonna Do.

My Fame Is Due To Broadcast Television.

I Say, If You're Going To Eat A Creature Alive, You Have To Expect Some Screaming. That Is The Carnivore's Burden.

I'm An Older, Wall-eyed, Overweight, Tweedy Writer Who Has Been Lucky Enough To Be Asked To Play Various Iterations Of Himself In A Certain Realm Of Popular Cultutre. That Gives Me Great Joy And Excitement, But I Don't Go To The Media Saying, "and I'm Also The World's Greatest Actor."

A Literary Agent Is Nothing But A Cheap Salesman (or Woman); While A Writer Is A Cheap Salesman (or Woman) Who Also Has To Actually Write The Books.