And, Of Course, The Funniest

The Symphony Orchestra Had Played Poorly, So The Conductor Was In A Bad Mood. That Night He Beat His Wife--because The Music Hadn't Been Beautiful Enough.

I Try Not To See New Comics - Their Acts Or Their Films. Part Of That Is Professional. I Don't Want To Be Influenced. But Another Part Is Fear And Jealousy. I'm Afraid To See How Good They Might Be. I Don't Like That Emotion, But It's Part Of Me.

Soft Rock Music Isn’t Rock, And It Ain’t Music. It’s Just Soft.

I'm Never Critical Or Judgmental About Whether Or Not A Movie Is Any Good. The Way I Look At It, If Several Hundred People Got Together Every Day For A Year Or So - A Number Of Then Willing To Put On Heavy Makeup, Wear Clothes That Weren't Their Own And Pretend To Be People Other Than Themselves - And Their Whole Purpose For Doing All This Was To Entertain Me, Then I'm Not Gonna Start Worrying About Whether Or Not They Did A Good Job. The Effort Alone Was Enough To Make Me Happy.

If Everyone In The World Sat Quietly At The Same Time, Closed Their Eyes And Concentrated As Hard As They Could On Peace And Goodwill, All The Killing And Cruelty In The World Would Continue. And Probably Increase.